How To Find Your Communicational Ikigai

There are always 3 conversations going on when you communicate.

How can you make sure they are ALL saying the same thing?


Perhaps you’ve heard of the 7-38-55 “rule”?

It is a concept concerning the communication of emotions, which states how other people supposedly create meaning from our communication:

  • 7% based on our words
  • 38% based on our tone of voice
  • 55% based on our body language


Whether we believe in the accuracy or not of these figures (they have been criticized),

the general concept rings true when we apply it to our experience.

Just think about it: how many times have you had a conversation with someone where their words were saying one thing, but their body language and vibe were saying something completely different in terms of their emotions?


At the very least, it highlights something essential:

The MESSENGER is even more important than the MESSAGE.


Because our listener isn’t blind.

They can sense “who” we are being on the inside.

They understand what is really being broadcast.

Through our mirror neurons, we leak our emotions to them like a dripping tap.

And that’s why we tend to trust body language and tone OVER words.


What does this mean for you, in your Business English?

Well, to create the powerful, meaningful impact you want,

to achieve your communicational IKIGAI,

you need to ensure that those 3 conversations are in harmony BEFORE you speak.


But how do you do that?

Your emotions influence and inspire your non-verbal and verbal communication.

They are the energy behind the words.

They are the gut feeling you get when you read between the lines.

So you need to spend just as much time intentionally preparing your emotional state as your content.


Here are some example questions to get you started:

– how do you intend to feel about your content/message AND your audience?

– how do you intend to feel about yourself as a speaker of English?

– which strategies can you use to ensure that all these dominos fall into place naturally when you open your mouth?


In short, how are you making sure that you’re in THE right state when you speak rather than in A right state? 😉

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